Laura’s Take: Not that what you’re saying isn’t important to your significant other, but sometimes it can be too much for them to handle. Imagine having a long, stressful day at work and coming home to only more stress? No one wants that. When you’re so close to a person, your moods are sometimes intertwined. For instance, I know that when I get in a depressed mood, Kris gets into that same mood. So if your complaining to your significant other, chances are, you’re only going to put them in a bad mood as well. I understand that sometimes, you just need to talk to somebody. It’s hard sometimes when you really need a shoulder to cry on, or complain on. You just don’t want to seem like all you do is complain (not attractive on anyone). Something that helps me is writing. If you like writing a personal journal, great, but some people don’t. I’m one of those people who feels that when you’re writing a journal, you’re writing to no one.
So this is what I do… I log into my e-mail and address the letter to Kris. Then I pretty much start writing the e-mail as if it were a journal, typing whatever I’m thinking at the time. It’s a really good method because I still get it off my chest, while I’m not complaining Kris’ ear off. After writing about what’s bugging me, I start feeling better and I can write some nice thoughts in my e-mail as well. It’s a good technique that seems to be working pretty good for me.
Kris’ Take: I agree with this to a point. If it’s just mindless complaining about anything and everything, then yes, please take the be quiet card. If you have a genuine concern, or just had a horrible day, I don’t mind you complaining away. I only role my eyes when I hear LFCs (Loud Frequent Complainers). There’s a couple at work; no matter what the issue, they must complain, and they must make it known to everyone. These people need a dunce cap and to sit in the corner.