Laura’s Take: So you’ve been dating each other for a few years now and you want to take the next big step towards spending the rest of your life together. Before you hear the hundreds of Congratulations, there’s a few questions you should ask yourself.
- Do you love the person with your whole heart? It may seem like a silly question, but there are many people today, who just get married for the companionship. That’s not the right reason. You need to love the person more than you love yourself and care about them more than you care about yourself. Can you picture yourself with that person years from now, when they’re old and looks are gone? Will you still love them just as much as you do now? Think about it.
- Do you know everything about each other’s past? Everyone has some kind of skeleton in the closet, so make sure you find out about it before walking down that aisle. Discovering a secret after you’re married can cause some severe problems for newlyweds. Talk about your problems with each other, whether it’s past relationships, family problems, or even just bad habits.
- Do you know what they want for the future? It’s more important than you may think. Conflicts about how to raise your future kids, or even about whether or not you want kids, can really put a lot of stress on a couple. Future career goals are also important. You want to be able to support your family down the road right? Make sure you see eye to eye on your future plans so you can both work towards making it a reality.
- Do you know what her answer will be? Honestly, you should. If you’re feeling nervous about whether or not she’ll say yes, maybe you need to take a step back and think about your relationship. Maybe you, as a couple, aren’t ready to handle that kind of relationship yet. No man wants to spend thousands on an engagement ring just to have it handed right back to him. If you truly love each other, you’ll know what her answer will be before you even ask.
- Do you see a wedding in the near future? When you ask someone to marry you, you’re saying, “I want to get married and spend the rest of my life with you,” not, “I love you and want to be engaged for the rest of my life.” Sure you need time to plan for the wedding, but don’t pop the question without taking the immediate future into consideration. Don’t expect to ask a girl “Will you marry me?” and plan for a long engagement. If you love them, commit to them, completely.